An Agent's Work Is Never Done
by conflictiveMordacity
Summary: Second chapter is here, and so is the evil coffee machine! Will Hailley defeat one of her worst foes? Or will anger get the best of her? Or both? Why am I asking so many questions? Full of wacky humor. Happy Memorial Day weekend for Americans!
1. Introduction to the Characters

Author's Notes: Now, this is just a character design for my future and past Club Penguin stories so that there isn't any confusion on your part. If you have read my cancer fic, (Which, I know a bunch of invisible ninjas have *wink*) then you know a couple of these OCs. If you haven't, read this first and then read "The Day a Part of Me Died Inside". It'll be clearer then.

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><p><strong>HailleyC.M.** – A 13-year-old agent who witnessed the "real" (This doesn't follow CP, but you'll see how this works) Waddle Squad and Veggie Villain missions. A girl with an explosive temper, she won't hesitate to whip you with her "magic" water. She has nicknames for a certain jet pack flyer, and is best friends with a silly rookie.

Personality: Sarcastic, sassy, silly, and smart just about sums this girl up. Hailley's also kind, impatient, stubborn, independent, and oblivious.

Appearance – A pink (Even though she hates the color) penguin with long, dark blonde hair. Instead of the common black eyes, she has dark teal eyes, in reference to her water and ice powers.

**Meg/Gizz** – The 15-year-old agent who introduced Hailley to the world of Club Penguin and the PSA, the psychic has a knack of knowing the obvious, unlike her pink pal. She doesn't like Rookie for whatever reason, and spends her free time insulting the green agent. She is known for destroying G's precious coffee machine, and Hailley keeps on fixing it, with a slap to Gizz's head.

Personality – A teasing penguin, she was known for being a bit of a brat (Total understatement), though she has grown more mature in her time in the PSA and EPF. She is dedicated to her friends, though she doesn't know when she's getting annoying, even if she's psychic.

Appearance – Gizz often changes her outfit, but most times, she is purple.

**Michaela** – She could be the twin of Cadence. She has weird ways of telling you if you're stupid, or if you're smart. (Nugget – Not bad, but not smart. Chicken Patty – Pretty smart.) She doesn't have any powers.

Personality – Quite honestly, you really don't want to be near her when there's sugar – related items: she is super hyper. She loves chicken, cupcakes, and too many things for her own good.

Appearance – Usually a purple penguin, she wears pretty much anything. It's pretty hard to describe her.

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><p>And now, I'll answer some reviews form "A Club Penguin Parody" here.<p>

JKDD – I'm just starting, so wait a little bit. Trust me; this is the beginning of those long stories. I just wanted to get out there before I blew up the … portal, I guess. *shrugs* As for the shipping: Yeah, I guess that's me, too. Hey, who cares if you have wacky ideas? I certainly don't! You are always welcome in my review family! =)


	2. Sneak a Peak!

AN: Hello, my readers! I am sooo sorry for lack of updates. Ebony actually PMed me to see what's up. I've been so busy lately, with school and Writer's Block (Pardon my French in a moment) fucking me up the ass. But, as a sign that I'm still alive, I decided to give you a sneak peek of "EPF"! Oh, and by the way, you can PM me your answer or post a review, but should I rename "EPF: Adventures of Hailley" to "EPF: Elite Penguin Force" due to the fact that it's not going to be all about Hailley? And that it's going to be like a cartoon? I'm seriously debating on it. "Adventures of Hailley" is a bit too cheesy for my liking, and I love cheese! D= Help a girl out, please! *Head desk* Sorry, here's your sneak peek!

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><p>[Discouraging] Gizz: Yes, but that chance is very slim.<p>

[Determined] Hailley: Then you don't know me very well.

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><p>Gizz: You don't know that.<p>

Hailley: We can still try.

[Sighing] G: Your efforts might be wasted.

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><p>[Silence. G nervously adjusts his tie.]<p>

G: You would be a great debater, C.M.

Hailley: I really don't care.

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><p>Gizz: The EPF's pretty powerful.<p>

Hailley: So? Hasn't stopped me before.

[Hesitant] Gizz: I guess so...

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><p>Ooh, how is this all connected? Well, I'm not telling you! You gotta guess on your own. And whoever gets the closest gets a brownie! Oh, and I realized that I didn't explain my new game: I like to put in little references, and it's your job to figure out what they are. There is at least one reference in all of my stories, so you can go back and try to figure out what the reference is when I don't update. And for each correct reference is a HUGE cookie! So come on! Search for those references!<p> 


	3. He Was Only a Rookie

**A/N: South (SWT3794): Hi there, guys. I know I've been absent a lot lately. If you've been to my deviantArt lately, you would know that life has been a pain in the butt recently.** **If you're confused right now, here is my dA (You need to put a dot/etc where it tells you to: http:/swt3794(dot)deviantart(dot)com/ I've got updates there, and sneak peeks to new things in my CP. But, now I'm introducing a new thing -**

**Hailley: Again.**

**South: Yes, again. You get to ask one of the characters up to 2 questions, and I will have random people be guests. But first, let's reveal our very first guest... *Dramatic pause* TEACON! (LycosTamer)**

**Teacon: Thanks guys. Glad I could do this.**

**Gizz: Well, do ya got a question or what?**

**Hailley: Gizz...**

**Teacon: It's okay. I'd like to ask Gizz something.**

**Gizz: Yes?**

**Teacon: Are you psychic?**

**Gizz: I was psychic before you were born!**

**Hailley: GIZZ! Sorry, she didn't mean that.**

**Gizz: Yeah, I did.**

**Hailley: Huh, what?**

**South: Well, before there are explosions, we got a rather shippy chappie ahead of us...**

**Hailley: Shippy? What's that supposed to mean?**

***Sweat-drop* South: Uh... nothing...**

-EPF-CP-EPF-CP-EPF-CP-EPF-CP-EPF-CP-EPF-CP-

[We zoom into the EPF HQ. JPG and Gizz are in an intense argument. Rookie is nervously glancing back and forth. Hailley enters.]

Hailley: Hey there, hi there.

[JPG and Gizz peep over at Hailley, who has sat down at the end of the table.]

[Stuttering] Rookie: H-hi, H-Haill-ey…

[Worried] Hailley: What's wrong, Rookie?

[She peeks at the still arguing JPG and Gizz. She takes notice of the words "Rookie" and "fired".]

[G enters]

[Shocked] Hailley: G, is Rookie going to be fired from the EPF?

[JPG and Gizz stop arguing and peer dumbfounded at Hailley]

[Voice cracking] JPG: How did you know?

[Narrows eyes] Hailley: Take a guess.

[Disappointed] G: Yes, he is. If no-one intervenes, that is.

[Hopeful] Rookie: So there's a chance that I can stay?

[Discouraging] Gizz: Yes, but that chance is very slim.

[Determined] Hailley: Then you don't know me very well.

[Rejoiceful] Rookie: See? Now I have a bigger chance at staying. Hailley's on my side. [He grins]

[Still discouraging] Gizz: You don't know that.

Hailley: We can still try.

[Sighing] G: Your efforts might be wasted.

Hailley: But Rookie is the face of the EPF! He's the communication lead! …Oh, sorry Jet.

[JPG grunts]

G: That may be so –

[Furious] Hailley: If we fire Rookie, don't you think that the rest of the island would be upset? That they would distrust us?

[Silence. G nervously adjusts his tie.]

G: You would be a great debater, C.M.

Hailley: I really don't care. Is Rookie going to stay or not?

[Hailley leans forward, and G slants backward]

[Blinking rapidly] G: I'll do my best, C.M.

[Jumping in the air] Rookie: YES!

[Folding her flippers] Gizz: Don't get your hopes up. Hailley doesn't always win.

Hailley: At least I'm trying.

Gizz: The EPF's pretty powerful…

Hailley: So? Hasn't stopped me before.

[Hesitant] Gizz: I guess so…

[The room fades out, and it seems to pass a few days since the revelation. **{Author interuption: Hello? I think I smell a big, choco-chip cookie somewhere... Hailley: Shut up and enjoy the darned show!}** Hailley is grinning widely as she enters.]

[Thrilled] Hailley: Rookie! I talked to the Director!

[Weary] Rookie: Oh yeah?

[Still grinning] Hailley: Yep! You're stayin'!

[Hailley hugs Rookie suddenly, nearly knocking him off balance]

[Raising her eyebrows] Gizz: I know you're happy Hailley… but is that really necessary?

[Hailley is still hugging Rookie, whose face is a reddish brown. **{Green + Red = Brown}** He finally hugs her back, his face slowly coloring back to green.]

Hailley: Yes, it is.

[Chuckling] JPG: Lovebirds…

[Hailley pretends to not hear him as she pulls away from Rookie, her normal pink turning to a light red. Rookie glares at JPG, who in turns smirks at him.]

Gizz: Well, isn't this a nice happy ending…

-EPF-CP-EPF-CP-EPF-CP-EPF-CP-EPF-CP-EPF-CP-

**South: Yeah, it is a nice happy ending.**

***Fuming* Hailley: Now I see what you meant by "shippy"...**

**Gizz: Ha, Hailley likes Rookie... **

**Hailley: No, I don't!**

**South: Well, remember to ask questions and to search "The Revelation"! There might be a huge chocolate chip calling your name...**

**Hailley: OOH! I KNOW IT!**

**South: Besides you, Hails. But nice try.**

**Hailley: Darned monkeyfeathers...**


	4. The Coffee Machine is EVIL

**South: Hey, sorry for not being here for a while. But I'm back!**

**Hailley: 'Bout darned time.**

**South: Hey, where's Gizz?**

**Hailley: It's Makorial Weekend. What do you think?**

**South: Oh. *Face palm* Well, I got some things to say before we get to the story. A) 76 hits. 3 reviews. What's wrong with this picture?**

**Hailley: A lot. Where's the love?**

**South: *Nods* Yes. There is a disturbing lack of reviews. What happened to JKDD? Smiley? I can understand if you've been busy, and I don't require that you review. But I _want_ you to. Is that too much to ask for?**

**Hailley: Maybe it's because your use of _French_.**

**South: Oh! Sorry, if that's why you guys left. I usually only use that kind of language if I'm really mad or something. I know CP is for 6-14 year olds, and I respect that.**

**Hailley: I was nearly 11 myself when I came to CP.**

**South: And I was 10 when I was first introduced to CP, through the real-life Gizz. But if you see "French" in any of my A/N's and you're under 12/13, just scroll down. You're not missing much.**

**Hailley: Also, we're both upset by nobody pointing out any references. Do you not get any of them? South even points out out some of them. **

**South: Come on, people and penguins! I have chocolate chip cookies here! Tons of them, in fact! Just review! I know you're out there, and I'm not psychic! **

**Hailley: And _someone_ forgot the disclaimer last chapter. Can someone do it, other than me?**

**South: Uh, sure. How about a new character coming in a few chappies? Jennifer?**

**Jennifer: Hey, my fellow penguins! South doesn't own Club Penguin or any of the characters. She does own Hailley, her mind, her sanity, a computer, her** **attitude, and me. Gizz is owned by South's real friend, whose name I am not saying. Happy reading! Also, try to guess what connection I have to one of the characters.**

EPF-CP-EPF-CP-EPF-CP-EPF-CP-EPF-CP-EPF-CP

**The Coffee Machine is EVIL**

It was just an average Saturday morning, an evil Satoday for me. At least, that's I thought. Strolling from the grey metal thing you weird penguins call an elevator, (Why is it called an elevator if it goes up _and_ down? Hmm.) I heard screaming from my favorite psychic.

"DIE YOU STUPID MACHINE! AND DON'T YOU _DARE_ BLOW STEAM AT ME! I _WILL_ TEAR YOU APART!" Gizz was hopping mad – literally. I couldn't see Rookie, and McEmo Sunglasses **(Not a grammar mistake) **was staring in disbelief at the psycho psychic.

"Hi, Hailley," Rookie squeaked, peeping out from under the table.

Sunglasses twisted around and said in his famous monotone (Which I _hate_…), "Gizz is going mad."

Quirking my eyebrow, I retorted, "So I see…" Then sighing, I continued in a low voice, "Looks like I will have to fix it. Again."

Glancing over at the now magenta faced penguin, Rookie yelped as he got up from under the table, "What is she doing to the coffee machine?"

"I'd have to agree with Rookie here…" Guess who said it.

"Those are standard EPF-style coffee machine assault tactics, guys... She's fine."

"You sure?" And I thought Jet was usually silent.

"Well, I'm hoping I'm right," I grimaced as Gizz started saying Spanish to the poor machine. Oh, wait: French = dirty words. Spanish = words like darn, shoot, the like.

"GRRRRRR!" Gizz stomped over to the table and plopped down in a seat. "That stupid machine!" She turned to me, and whined, "Why do you have to keep on fixing it? We all know that if G can't make it work, you should stop fixing it!"

"That's only because you keep on hitting it. If you would stop doing that, maybe it wouldn't _be_ broken all the time."

"But its _evil_." The psychic's eyes were oddly shaped as she leaned towards me. **(Or, in other words, o.O)**

I narrowed my eyes. "Right, and pigs will fly." I walked over the beaten machine only to be blasted away by really hot steam.

"YOWCH!" Landing face forward on the floor, I groaned in pain.

Rookie gasped, "Hailley! Are you okay?"

Arching my eyebrows skywards, I snapped, awkwardly standing up, "NO, I'm not! I just got blasted by a coffee machine with stinkin' hot steam! Do you THINK I'm okay?"

Rookie backed away from me, "Just asking."

EPF-CP-EPF-CP-EPF-CP-EPF-CP-EPF-CP-EPF-CP

About 15 minutes later, I wasn't feeling any better.

Turning to the rest of my co-workers, I squawked, "This coffee machine is evil!"

Gizz smirked, and smugly said, "What did I tell you?"

G slid past me all of a sudden. Taking a double take, I cried, "G! When did you get here? Wait, don't go near that machine! It will put you in a coma! It's EVIL!"

G ignored me as he whipped out a wrench.

"What is he doing…" Rookie tilted his head to his left, "Doesn't he realize that it'll hurt him?"

"Apparently not," Gizz whispered loudly.

In a matter of seconds, the coffee machine was back to normal. Don't you just hate it when things go bad for you, but behave when someone else does the same thing you did?

"Oh, sure; you hurt _me_ every way possible when I try to fix you, and then when _he_ comes and repairs you, you act like a good little machine!" I bent my flipper towards my eyes, then to the darned coffee machine. **(Think of the 'I'm watching you' gesture. . I'm bad at describing things. =P) **

Then, the darned machine decides to be a rebel. **(Rebel yell! Yeah, yeah! XD) **Blasting steam at me, you could see evil written all over the _thing_.

Whipping my flippers in front of me, the steam turned to water, but it didn't help my case. If anything, it made it worse. Flying over the three little steps, I crashed near the hologram entrance.

"See, G? _The machine is EVIL!_" I stood up, feeling anger take over me, inch by inch. "I'm telling you! It just blew me away like a fly! All because of you, G! You've made me fix that stupid thing ever since I joined the PSA! The _PSA_! What's that, three or so years? And now it HATES ME!"

Rookie decides to take that moment to interrupt me before I can glow it up. "You know, she _does_ have a point."

"Thank you, Rookie. Now I'm outta here before that evil device can injure me further. Good day, for now." Taking out my spy phone, I disappear into the light.

EPF-CP-EPF-CP-EPF-CP-EPF-CP-EPF-CP-EPF-CP

**South: I've been waiting to do this for a _long _time. Whenever I hear or see 'Coffee machine' in Club Penguin, I instantly think _'It's EVIL!'_ And, yes, that is a reference right there.**

**Hailley: South even says it in one of the descriptions of our supernatural agents. You said it in Gizz's bio, right?**

**South: Yeah, I think so. So yeah, review. Just say 'Hi'. I'll hop around the house even if it's one letter. Reviews are love. And sarcasm. You gotta have it. Oh, and Teacon: When are ya gonna PM me? It's been like a month since you said that. Been busy?**


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